Am I not being a Good Christian?

I completely understand the fact that in the good times and the bad times you should always Trust in Our Lord and Savior.  If you understand that true empowering fact, then why is it that in specifically the bad times everyone has a tendency to tell you to "Seek Him" or "Trust Him."  Isn't that what I have been doing already?  Do I have a flashing indicator on my face that says "Not Trusting in Him right now" or "Not Seeking Him at the moment"? 

I am battling some heartbreaking news that I just received yesterday.  I am hurt, lost, and torn up about the news.  I am at the point where I feel like I am losing hope......I know in my heart that the Lord does not want me to give up hope, instead he wants me to brush myself off and look forward to what he has in store for me.  Why is it then....that....I just want to ball my eyes out and ask "why, why, why" over and over until I get my way somehow?  Isn't that how we got our way when we were kids?  I know it worked for me a few times. :)

My husband has been an amazing individual through my hardship or I should say OUR hardship.  He has been there for me to have a shoulder to cry on, he has let me know that he will never leaving my side, and best of all, he took the blame for the hurt that I am experiencing.  He is so sweet!  I know it is not his fault, and I also know it is not my fault.........it is just not in God's plan.....now....or maybe ever.

My husband, and a couple friends of mine have been truly a wonderful support through my ordeal.  I just have this thing where I do not get the fact that the one piece of advice that I am receiving.....I thought it was something I was already working my hardest to do.....TRUSTING HIM....  Not only do I do it through the difficult times, but I remind myself in the gratifying high points in my life,  I need to Seek Him and give Him the glory for it.

I asked my husband this morning if it seemed as though I was not leaning on the Lord to get me through my hurt feelings.  He told me that he new I was, but in times like these loved ones may be at a loss for words and only know to remind you to Trust in Him.  Looking at it from that perspective, I understand now that I am not being told that I am a bad Christian and I need to Seek Him.  Instead,  these all powerful words of encouragement of "Trusting in Him" or "Seek Him" are more like a shield to keep me cleansed from all the bad influences out there.  Thank you Jesus for putting such awesome people in my life!!!